Survivor Poem: A Pedophile’s Manipulative Strategy

A Pedophile’s Manipulative Strategy

By: Aisha Aberdeen, Toronto

1. Attack those people she holds closely.
Tell her, her family is faulty,
Make her distrust her friends.
NB. When she needs them
She’ll be lonely, in the End.

2. Attack her accomplishments,
Tell her, they are part
Of a spiritual punishment.
NB. She needs to believe that
your knowledge and ritual
Hold loving sentiments.

3. Attack her, physically if she refuse
To believe,
That you’re an angelic being.
Whisper near her, then tell her
She’s hearing things.
NB. Offer nothing, then tell her,
All she needs is the breath of life.
And if she ever raise her anger in strife
Tell her, she has the devil inside

4. Always appear to have her best interest
Raise your arm in public,
In a defensive posture
And none will know,
You’re an imposture!

5. Attack her mind every moment you get
Analyze her, psychologically
That’s how you keep ahead one step
NB. Show no emotions, for a woman
That will always get her upset.
Your goal is to make her look crazy
From the onset!

6. Attack her loyalty,
If she tries to take the baby to the mall
Claim she’s trying to run, taking all.
Tell her she wants the family divided
Not allowing you a chance to raise your kid.
NB. Make sure she’s filled with guilt
Then beg her to confess.
Ask her to give you a “written manifest”
Of all the things you detest, in her.

7. Attack constantly, her choices,
That’s how you take her voice,
And give her voices in her head,
It matter not if she does wrong / right
Its’ that she consulted not,
With what you said.
NB. That’s how you make her scared,
Make her constantly doubt herself.

8. Always appear to have her best interest,
To your mutual friends and family
Make her out to be a manic
And remember, this is where,
You must appear, your sincerest.

9. Attack anything she repeats.
Inform her that her education
Is a misrepresentation of an assimilated culture
Tell her that her professor’s
Are vultures
NB. Inflate your dichotomies with hate,
Tell her she loves’ not her own

10. Attack her sense of feeling;
If she’s on the floor choking,
Tell her she’s breathing,
And she needs more of the
Divine masculine
NB. Show her the best strategies to cope
Ensure she becomes silent in her hurt.

11. Infiltrate her space,
With negative and hate-filled imagery
Give her books and DVD’s
With the most hateful conspiracies
N.B. Then tell her she’s filled
With negative energy

12. Always appear, to have her best interest;
So act as though you mean,
To offer help.
When she wants to do it herself,
Make sure she gains debts
For what you do.
Thus you’ll have her down fall
through and through

13. Attack her, attack on your ruse.
Ensure her you have nothing, and
She everything to lose, then leave
N.B. This guarantee’s
That she will neither complain
Nor Plea to the police

14. Attack her love interests
Ensure they know your
Thoughts and not hers
Read all her communications
And make sure it’s understood,
That she’s crazy, lonely
Even the mother of your baby
N.B. Your ultimate goal is,
To make them stay away.
Neither should her heart or mind
Be given time away, from your game.

15. Ensure that she will ask not
Of you sexually,
Tell her that you must now reflect
On your spirituality
Then tell her, she’s “not sexually clean”,
And lack the spiritual aspect of your queen
NB. Say even,
You must remain clean, for you’re a chosen seed
The word god will send to her any-day

16. Appear to have her best interest in heart.
Ask her to reflect, and for you pray.
Tell her you’re not the same
Man you who appeared 2000 or 2012
Years ago to date!

17. Attack her for not believing, You
or any one is the messiah incarnate
If she question’s your authority
Tell her it was bestowed by HIM monarchy
N.B. Then claim you were welcomed
an stayed in an Ethiopian monastery
Or “even Bob Marley’s family, loves me”

18. Attack her, especially if she questions the way,
You talk, look and play
With her child
Tell her “its her paranoid demon inside”
N.B. Ensure she knows her ways usually hide,
And it’s when she speaks, she reveals her real vile.
Say all this with a smile
To “question a man like Christ, who only knows
How to love his child”.

“ It’s your evil mind running wild again”
Call her friends, attempt to have an
Intervention.
Tell them your intention is pure.
Babble some shit on “prophetic cosmic law”.

19. Attack her especially if she decides to leave,
Physically overwhelm her, with her child
In her arms.
Exact so much terror
That she’ll never again
upset the order of things.
NB. Make her believe that it’s all her doing
And when she flips the script
Calls you out on your very nature.
“You’re non-apologetic,
Delusional on your god trip,
Not prophetic, but pathetic”

With single words, I broke your logic.
Understood your cause was not,
Of the same God,
Most folks agree with.
NB. Spent too much time
Explaining to me “Christ was God
and God was Satanic”

20. Appear to have her best interest in heart
Wanting more time with the family you start
But then only the child.
And for a while she thought you were genuine
Until the same traits began to rear its head again.
For it’s the child who’d complain
That you profess thoughts
And actions that are demented.

“I expect that you’d soon blame
Her parentage”.

Survivor Poem: Reclaiming Together

Reclaiming Together

By: Summer LaBrie

We had been hurt
In so many ways
We knew pain
And how to obey

We tried not to cry
We wanted to fight
But survival took over
We did what was right

We lived with the pain
Some days, some years
Taking the punishment
Controlled by fear

Evil is among us
It walks the Earth
Taking love and hope
And even self-worth

Now it is our turn
Take back control
Take back our dreams
Our thoughts and our souls

When you can’t stand
I will stand you tall
And you will catch me
Whenever I fall

United we will conquer
And begin to feel
Helping each other
Through our journey to heal

Survivor Poem

By: LivKatherine

Filling in the,
Blank stares,
Empty promises,
Scribble on the white pages of his lies,
Permanently etching in the lost words,
Losing days with hopeless cares,
Mistakes crowding her skies,
Feeding hideous monstersm
With her lullabies,
Out of song,
They watched her walk away.
Turned down the blinds,
Covered their eyes.
They never even heard,
Her heart scream.
How she yearned,
Achingly for that love.
Up for grabs,
Her common sense had highest
Bid farewell to desperate times.
They let her slip away,
Dissappear into the cracks,
She’ll never look back.
There’s no way to choose,
When both ways,
You lose.

This poem is from www.facebook.com/LivKatherine . It’s public facebook page that anyone can go to, put up by a survivor of 8 years of sexual abuse and rapes, and a seperate sexual assault that occurred a couple years later. The page is based on hope, encouraging others, and raising awareness to things such as victim blaming, and the horrifying statistics around sexual crimes.

Survivor Poem: He

He

By: Kelsey Thachuk

His hands resembled claws
His outstretched fingers were the nails that were used to pin children
His desire cast shadows over the little frames he sought to capture
they grew up to be tilted frames on others walls
the outlines destroyed from trying to be fixed a little too secretly & a little too quickly
pieces were mashed together endlessly again & again trying to desperately find some hidden reason hoping that maybe a profound truth was overlooked
and if we looked hard enough
if we dissected and analyzed it just one more time
wed find it
I have yet to find a good answer
he didn’t care
he doesn’t care
he just wanted to fill a hole with the type of touches that aren’t meant for those little worlds
he will walk freely down the street with a smile while his shadow crawls & catches more

Survivor Poem: Untitled

By: Anonymous

when heart is starving, food is survival
feeding oneself a means of revival

heart under bone, broken to eat
cracking oneself a way to the meat

heart was weak, softer than veal
under-nourished but enough for a meal

now heart is muscle, tougher than steak
medium rare but harder to break

Survivor Poem: Ctrl- Alt- Delete

Ctrl- Alt- Delete

By: Richmaggs

Tell the truth, you said. Never tell me a lie.
So I did as you asked and your light nearly died.
So from then on I lied if you asked for the truth,
Am I ugly and fat – am I rude and aloof?
Your questions unfair as I stammered afraid,
Another wrong answer, another tirade
Of violent abuse aimed solely at me
From your mine of self loathing, a vile purgatory.

So I’d tell the truth and see your fading smile
And then backtrack to a lie just to keep you alive.
You bestowed me a power to turn your troubled world dark,
Beneath the cracked eggshells your path always black.

I’d bend and twist truths at your subconscious request,
But the sowed seeds of doom would scatter and fester
In your damaged mind while I’d be left shivering
Alone on the outside with my psyche withering
With the scars of your life to love and to cherish,
My presence defined – I will not let you perish.

Feeding you your lies went against my honest grain,
But it was all I could do to help you refrain
From sinking beneath your rapid white water,
A life without you is all I ever thought of.
Yet I remained your pawn in the mate I’d never win,
How could I run away and let you do yourself in?

To hide you from truth wasn’t just my decision,
Our scalpel of lies caused the first deep incision.
Lies to hide your past and lies to protect
You from yourself and so no one would suspect
That it was you and not me that repulsed you the most,
The uncomfortable truth of a little girl lost.

So it’s over, it’s gone – should I have ever let you in?
Would someone please restore me to my factory setting.
Your turbulence and torment didn’t bring my defeat,
All I ever needed was Control Alt Delete.

January 2012

Check out more of my poems at http://www.booksie.com/richmaggs

Survivor Poem: Untitled

By: v

Boxed my shadow,
Knocked her to the floor.
Chased my demons,
Locked them out the door.

Strung out high,
On brittle hope and fragile trust.
Ceasing to deal,
With his wicked lust.

Learning to accept,
An inconceivable truth.
Clouded with secrets.

Places where scars have wept blanket my soul.

Vile eyes take me in.
I turn my back,
He’ll never win.

The fingers that once clothed my body,
And buried my love
Deep beneath my bare skin.

Unearthed an intoxicating rage,
A steady willingness to fight,
A yearning to disengage,
From the past,
From the monster.
Extract myself from the binding ties.
But an eye for an eye,
Leaves the whole world blind…

Survivor Poem: Dance

Dance

By: Joua Yang (Incest survivor), Milwaukee

They declared, “Dance in the rain”.
I did, except now I can’t tolerate the acid it contains.
Drenched in unbearable anguish, it is inevitable no shelter be found.
My eyes caved in long ago from the horror it has witnessed.
My heart, feasted on by the beastly creator of me.
My broken sky cried acid rain and I have no choice but to bathe the blackness.
Lord, bestow innocence upon these eyes once more
so they may come out of hiding.
Make the beast regurgitate my heart; mummify it back
into my restless echoing chest.
Unclothed, cold, and exposed to the bone
I deeply desire to see, feel, and be whole again.
I am but a wandering skeleton retracing my steps,
collecting lost flesh; nevertheless my soul is barely holding onto me.

Survivor Poem: maive

maive

By: Feywit

maive “when there is an incredible change in performance in skill, power, morale over a short time” urban dictionary.

who knew you saw so clearly as a child

what all others closed eyes to?

a depth of knowledge without knowing.

the others of us held the sensation in our poisoned skins

for this had no name in that era. Maybe.

hairs raised on the neck. Warnings.

Cooties. Close.

The Heebeegeebees. Closer.

yet we spoke not.

speak not. of the victimization

of children.

who grow up bristling in spine

warped in Heart.

you locked yourself behind the

marginal safety of a locked bath

for hours.

hiding from in- house invaders.

now attacking.

signs seen in an eon past,

ignored by those delegated to our safety.

Interpreted as The Disobedient or Sullen child.

how was it, then

we never learned your secret of invisibility?

how convenient that cloak.

would have been. time

After time.

no voice carried the words.

we lacked the vocabulary

to ring the alarm.

gray tape encircled our pronouncements.

through generations.

now in our retirement years.

we finally pull hard on the tape.

with the same decades-old fears.

though, we are, indeed, stronger

having suffered the rages and cruelty

of men and their version of Power.

Now we are a force of our own.

none are not likely to forget.

We will remind them.

We must,

for it burns through.

Our souls.

even stronger

through a half century.

of seasoning.

it taints us as women.

with tinted hair.

fighting hard against the gray.

for each child casualty

in this battlement of

brute power.

results in  persons who see

each

man

As an offender.

If for this reason,

they call me a witch.

I am glad. For I have broken

snake charmer’s hex.

I did not have to remember these things, they have remembered themselves all these years.     Black Elk Speaks

Survivor Poem: Confession

Confession

By: Debra Butler, Austin, TX

There’s a place inside of me
Deep down, hidden for my sanity
Unseen, unheard
Too scary for many

Will I ever be ready?
Can somebody tell me
I yearn to know
What darkness lies inside of me

I close my eyes
Think of this place
But all I see is empty space
I feel it, I know it

Something horrible happened
Over and over again
It changed me
Will they believe me?

This may sound crazy
But maybe, just maybe
I don’t remember
The truth may kill me

Perhaps I should let go
I may never know
Oh well, I’m alive
I’m here for a reason

Should I have assurance in knowing
That I know nothing?
Do I need proof?
The scars will do

Oh wait, the burns
The nightmares
Obsession, Addiction, Perfection
To name a few

This is all so new
What should I do?
Truth be told
I will be bold

Those evil eyes
Are just a disguise
I know you’re in pain
But I’m not to blame

It’s really a burden
To be this uncertain
But I will do my best
To lay it to rest

Oh well, I’m alive
Life goes on
I’m not crazy
I’m here for a reason